Thursday, December 2, 2010

I'm reading your heart

It's funny how you can suddenly find yourself all alone, no one to rely on but yourself. You ask yourself, how the fuck did I get here? And most importantly, what the fuck happened? I tend to analyze things more than I should. I dissect everything until it's impossible just to figure out why and how certain events took place.

I grew up being surrounded by people I thought who cared about me and whom in return, I cared for. There were people present in the various phases of my life. They might have been different people as the years went by. But that still didn't change the fact that I had someone to turn to. The dependence and the reliability, they were guaranteed things. I didn't have to worry about those.

However, this year, I learned that yeah, life can be funny sometimes. The world you were once accustomed to can change quicker than you could ever imagine.

People will leave intentionally without a given reason. People will give up on you. As Shakespeare once said, "Things are not what they seem." Hell yeah, they're not.

I was let down. I was disappointed. And you could say, I was hopeless.
I didn't know what to do. It was the first time, in my eighteen years of living, that I was put in that situation. With time, I became more independent; self-reliable. Selfish in a good way.

I would always question why it had to happen to me in this stage of my life where such a thing is an asset. Honestly, I still don't know for sure. I'm guessing God, the powerful energies, this Universe, or whatever you want to call It, is helping me to grow stronger as a person. To explore not only the greatness of life but the downside part as well.

I was bitter about it. I can say now though, that I am not anymore. I have accepted it with open arms. So life, bring it the fuck on.

To those people that were once present at some point in my life, thank you for everything. Thank you for leaving.
To the people I have met since then, thank you for taking the time to just be there.
To the people I will meet in the near or far future, I can't wait until we do eventually meet.

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